


Tears are dying, Heart was crying

by Amelora



Series: Bartender and his Customer [1]
Category: Elite (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Different First Meeting, Flirting, Fluff, Love Confessions, M/M, Omander - Freeform, Romantic Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-13
Updated: 2021-01-13
Packaged: 2021-03-15 18:16:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,304
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28693086
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amelora/pseuds/Amelora
Summary: Ander experiences two life-changing events on the same day.----THIS IS PART OF A SERIES.----First Part: Tears are dying, Heart was cryingSecond Part:Sounds are dying, Heartbeat was cryingThird Part:Breaths are dying, Lung was cryingLast Part:Sorrows are dying, Hope was crying
Relationships: Ander Muñoz & Omar Shana, Ander Muñoz/Omar Shana
Series: Bartender and his Customer [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2117583
Comments: 8
Kudos: 42





	Tears are dying, Heart was crying

Ander was walking on the crowded street. He was still trying to convince himself of the words he had heard a few hours ago.

_"You have cancer."_

Unbearable headaches, nausea, lumps that appeared on his body after repeated nosebleeds ... Although he knew the result that they all dragged him one by one, he did not want to believe it.

He didn't want to go home because it was morning hours. The truth is, he didn't know how to get home. He had just moved into that house with his mother… Ander still didn't know how to talk about this with his mother.

His feet had taken him to that bar where he often came. He went directly to the area where the bartenders were, settled on a chair and sat like that without ordering anything. Although he wanted to put his phone right in front of him and know if anyone would call, how he would spend his time here was another problem. Several people passed by, trying to talk to Ander, but he was not responding exactly to any of them. Because if he drink more than normal, he might not have the consequences. He didn't know what cancer could bring him.

His head was on the bar table when he sat there for about half an hour. He was sure he looked like a drunk even though he didn't drink anything. He was so inconsiderate at that moment that he felt like he could do some stupid moves that drunk people do. Of course, screaming by saying 'why me' ...

"Hey…" Ander was being poked by the shoulder even though he wasn't asleep or even his eyes were closed. As if this act to awaken or awaken someone made Ander quite uncomfortable. A boy kept touching his shoulder as if it wasn't enough standing on top of him. Ander was very uncomfortable when a stranger kept touching his arm when he was not intolerant of anything at that moment.

Ander quickly lifted his head. He shoved the arm of that man he thought was one of the bartenders with his right hand. "Stop it." His voice was rather pale and lifeless.

"I asked if you wanted something, but you didn't answer."

Ander instantly regretted his rude when he saw the man's very polite demeanor. He absolutely disliked these mood swings, and now he added the fear of the dead. He hated the sound in his brain, constantly screaming that he is sick.

"Does it concern you?"

The boy in front of him smiled inevitably.

"Actually it concerns. I work here after all."

Although Ander wanted to be reckless, his thoughts changed when he looked at the man in front of him. Though he knew that one of the things that cancer brought about was a lack of sexual desire, although he felt it quite a bit in recent weeks, he only imagined for a moment what this boy in front of him might feel when he kisses his lips. Ander felt as if something is being rebuilt, as his imaginary world had crumbled a few hours ago. He felt that an emotion he had not witnessed before spread to his imaginary world.

Although he had trouble separating his gaze from the boy, he did so suddenly. He dropped his head quickly, just like the sudden moments of imaginary. In fact, he wanted to look at that boy for a long time.

"I didn't want anything." Ander responded very softly.

"Then now would you like something?"

Ander was thinking. As his body begged for a drink, he could hear the voices in his brain telling him don't. In fact, he thought he had to voluntarily destroy himself before his body was sufficiently destroyed. What a stupid idea it was. However, he would later be grateful for what he did.

"Yeah. I want something tough."

"Are you sure it's not something you especially wanted?"

Ander suddenly lifted his bowed head. He did not like the questioning and insistent attitude of the bartender. Actually no ... He was just angry, and if anyone could take out his anger, it was this bartender across from him.

"Give me something, why are you questioning so much ?!"

The smiling face of the bartender had shrunk and began to sulk. When Ander was so depressed, he began to think it was ridiculous to come to a crowded place. The bartender was questioning himself whether he was bothering him or not. Ander didn't know what kind of thinking trouble he was giving that boy.

\---

A few glasses, a few bottles ... Ander didn't know how much he had finally drunk. It was evident from the fact that the people sitting next to him changed several times that he had been here too long and had taken as much drink as he could.

He was feeling nauseous, dizzy, and his brain was getting loud sounds and ringing in his ears. _You're sick now ..._ Even though his eyes were on his phone all the time, he couldn't see the watch clearly. The field of vision was also blurred. Ander, who unknowingly closed his eyes, let himself go into the warm arms of sleep.

###

Omar did not expect to see this boy he was used to seeing so often around here - in a way he had never seen before - so worn out.

Ander ... He heard his name several times from the people he was hanging out with here. But he never had the full opportunity to talk to him. He had never met him and never found that courage in himself. What a fool he thought he was. When he told his family that he was gay, he could not find the courage he found in talking to this boy. Moreover, he knew that, in the end, he would not be his family member or expelled from his home. And it was as if he told him that he liked him, and he thought that if he didn't get a response, he would have had a more painful outcome than losing his family. What stupidity ...

And when he saw that nobody was interested in him today, he approached him. He knew he hadn't ordered anything since he arrived. He knew Ander was not giving correct answers to the questions anyone asked and his face is rather pale. Because observing Ander was the best activity of the day for Omar. However, he had been unable to do this for a few weeks. He was even starting to think he wouldn't come here again anymore. When he finally came here again, he felt an intense joy in him. But he waited. He also saw several co-workers approach him. He didn't pay enough attention to their interest. Moreover, there was an intense tension over Ander. What a desperation ... How much he would like to be with him and dissipate that tense air.

Omar finally reached out to where Ander put his head. His hand would almost go to his curls. He didn't know how he had stopped himself from doing this. A voice echoed in his brain as he put his hand on his shoulder and poked slowly. _You touch him for the first time ..._

When Ander finally reacted back to him, Omar was still hesitant to talk to him. Moreover, he would just ask him if there was anything he wanted. He would do this because of his job. What a vulnerable feeling ... It turns a person into someone he is not _._

_\---_

Omar found himself constantly giving Ander glasses. One glass is emptied and the other is filled again. Omar was tired of this cycle. But Ander had no intention of stopping yet.

A few times Omar even considered making a move to ask Ander why he was so depressed. But in the end he didn't ask anything. He could not find the courage to ask him this.

He noticed that Ander fell asleep where he put his head this time, as his working hours were almost over. When he touched his shoulder several times and tried to wake him, Ander simply pushed the hand that was trying to wake him up. He did not wake up. For hours, he just fell asleep there, putting his head on the bar table.

Ander was still in the same place when Omar's work hour was over. He was still asleep. And even though Omar's co-workers warned him, he did not lift his head. Omar thought he could leave him like this. Even if they hadn't met yet, he knew that he could leave him that way or not. When he saw one of his co-workers picking up Ander's phone, he immediately interrupted.

"Give me the phone."

When his co-worker obediently gave Omar the phone "His mother is calling." he muttered. Without much thought, Omar answered the phone.

###

Ander opened his eyes with a severe headache. When he was not quite sure where he was for a brief moment, he made a move to turn his head. And at that moment a severe pain entered his neck. When he thought of the cause of this pain, which was so severe that he had to hold back in order not to shout, he thought that he should be in the bar now, not in his home and bed.

When he scanned his memory, he remembered how he got to the bar and why he went, but he did not remember how he came back from there. Moreover, he did not remember whether he had said anything to his mother about cancer. His mind was perplexed.

He tried to change his clothes and tidy himself up. He left his room and went to his mother's ground floor.

First he thought of what kind of scolding he would hear, but if he hadn't somehow told his mother that he had cancer last night, he was thinking how to say it now.

How could he tell a woman who just separated from her husband that her son is dying?

"Oh, so you finally woke up."

His mother greeted Ander sitting at the kitchen table with a coffee in hand.

"Good Morning." Ander said in a feeble voice. Even he hardly heard what he said. When he sat opposite his mother at the kitchen table, he felt his mother's horrible gaze on him. And he was sure. He hadn't told his mother that he had cancer. This was both a good thing and a bad thing. If he couldn't say with that absent mind, he would never say with that sober mind.

"Do you remember what happened last night?" his mother spoke trying to keep calm.

Ander answered her question with only his head. He could not remember.

"God…" his mother's hand went to her temples. She was rubbing her temples nervously. When Ander saw this state of his mother, he regretted the childish behavior he did yesterday. He shouldn't -musn't-be drinking that much. Did he want to speed up his death?

"Do you know how many times I called you yesterday ?! What were you thinking about drinking so much ?!"

Ander was silent. He knew that these questions were not asked for answers. But he knew it wasn't right for him to be silent either.

"Okay, I understand. You hold yourself responsible for our situation with your father, but you know, Ander, there was always a problem between us, I and him."

"Mom…" Ander spoke suddenly. He knew well that he did not have enough energy to talk to his mother about his father. And he wanted to cut this conversation as short as possible. "I don't want to talk about this anymore. And I promise you I will never do anything like I did yesterday."

"You promise?" his mother repeated to make sure. He was softened inside, although he was still angry about his son's behavior yesterday. Because he thought the problem was caused by his son's parents — herself.

"Yes." Ander answered in a very low voice. He needed to show that he was sincere, but he didn't know how to achieve it. He was very tired.

"This is good because I don't know how long I can get mad at you." Ander smiled. She had to respond to her mother in some way. Moreover, smiling might have even relieved him.

\---

When Ander started having breakfast with his mother, he was quite lacking in appetite. He had no idea how much he drank yesterday. But he felt the problem that drink was making in his stomach. Although the reason for this lack of appetite was the amount of alcohol he took, the reasons for this would be the chemotherapies he received - cancer. Although his mother did not force him to eat, sooner or later she would react to his lack of appetite. Ander knew that such a moment would never come, while questioning within himself whether it was the right moment to say he had cancer.

"You don't remember how you got here yesterday, do you?"

Ander was startled by his mother's sudden question.

"I don't remember." He dropped the fork in his hand and continued on his plate. "How did I get here?"

His mother replied as she took a sip of her coffee. "An employee brought you here from the bar you went to. He brought you."

Ander's eyes widened. Yesterday he had a problem with strangers. Ander felt like a pathetic man - a sick man -.

"How?" Ander suddenly asked. "How did he get me here?"

"He spoke to me. Yesterday I was calling you and he replied instead. Of course it all happened in the middle of the night. It was almost midnight. You had to get out of there because the bar was almost closing time, but you were asleep. God, Ander. Still don't know what's on your mind."

"Who?" Ander asked, ignoring what his mother had said. "Did he say who he is? His name? Anything about himself?"

"No, Ander, was he supposed to say?"

Ander became silent again. But he had already decided in his mind. He would go back to the bar today.

"When you think about it, I think you owe the kid a serious thank you." his mother muttered to herself. But it was a speech loud enough for Ander to hear.

"What- Why?"

"You came here by taxi, he wouldn't let me pay and ... Uhm ... I don't know what you did with the boy along the way, but taxi driver was so angry you vomited in the his car."

"Ah. I can't believe it." Ander put both hands to his face. He felt quite ashamed of himself. Although he wanted to thank the person who helped him, he did not know if he could solve this problem with thanks.

\---

Ander finally got permission to leave the house after prolonged pressure from his mother on him. His mother had at least suggested that he rest at home all day long that day. But Ander did not feel like he could follow this recommendation. He should have both apologized and thanked whoever had a problem as soon as possible.

Not knowing what to do or whom to consult, he sat in one of the chairs opposite the bartenders like yesterday. A bartender approached him without having to wait there as long as yesterday.

"What would you like?"

"Actually, I ... I came here yesterday and ... I fell asleep here. So ..." Ander was having trouble speaking. He did not know exactly where to start or how to describe his problem.

"I'll take care of him, you can take care of other customers." Ander turned to the intervening voice in the speech. Yesterday, after learning that he had cancer, he was looking at what he remembered most clearly - the person. Ander was a little relieved, knowing that this person was not a dream. And seeing his face moved something inside him more than he had anticipated.

"I thought after drinking that much yesterday you wouldn't come again."

Ander came out of the instant hypnosis effect he entered with the words of the bartender.

"Uhm ... No. I didn't come to drink."

The bartender smiled. Ander thought he could only touch those lips that curl while smiling. This boy's lips...

"I wouldn't give you a drink even if you came for it anyway."

"Don't your bosses get mad at you?"

"Maybe ... But they also have privileges for men who are beautiful." 

Ander answered the boy with a similar smile. But he did not understand who he meant by beautiful men. He thought it was the privilege that his bosses were honoring Omar. But actually Omar wanted to praise him.

Omar put a glass in front of him and poured water into it.

"But if you still want to drink something, get this from our establishment."

"Water?" Ander asked with his eyebrows raised. The bartender's -Omar- playful and slightly childish demeanor liked it more than he thought.

"Yes, why not?"

Ander was still smiling. Before drinking the whole glass of water, he thought of how this bartender in front of him could put a smile on his face so easily. Ander did not think he was happy with such simple gestures.

"Thank you." He handed the glass towards him and put it on the table. Ander was unaware. But the bartender's eyes remained on him.

"I actually came here because of the problem I had yesterday. Also ... I'm not sure. Did I pay for the things I drank yesterday?"

The bartender laughed a lot.

"You haven't paid any of them. Dude, I gave my four months' salary to this."

Ander panicked instantly. He continued talking as he tried to get his wallet out of his pocket. "I'll pay now. I'm really sorry."

"Okay, calm down. It's okay for now. We'll handle it."

The bartender was trying to prevent Ander's hasty attitude with quick moves. On the one hand, he was looking for the right words to continue his speech. "I have no doubt that you will pay anyway, I know you are a regular customer here."

Ander was staring at the bartender with an expression read out of his surprise. "Oh, is that so?"

"Yes. You don't need to be so nervous."

"Then you were the one who took me home yesterday, right?" Ander asked this question hesitantly. He was afraid that his reply would be no and that he would be directed to someone else. He felt really relaxed with him. And he didn't think he could feel the same as another stranger.

"Yes." The bartender was looking at Ander again with a big smile on his face.

While Ander was relaxing with the answer he heard, he could not control his body gestures, he could not prevent his smile, no matter how hard he tried to assume the image of a boy. Also, after the problems he had yesterday, he did not think that the tough boy image would do well.

"I want to both thank and apologize. And I don't think that one word will be enough. So ... Is there anything I can do in return for your kindness?"

"Words will be enough for me. I am honest." Ander didn't know why he hadn't met this very kind boy before.

"Please ... I insist. Is there anything I can do?"

The bartender's face had become thoughtful. However, he did not separate his face from Ander. Ander would be desperate when the bartender waited for a long time. There was a possibility that he would ask for money. Or something like that. And if it happened as he thought he would be seriously disappointed.

"Actually there is." The bartender was looking resolutely into Ander's eyes. "You can tell me the problem that got you in that state yesterday?"

"I did not understand."

"You can tell me your problem that will make you drink that much yesterday."

Ander did not expect this, amidst many of the many disappointing thoughts that came to his mind at that moment. But this instant question warned the tough boy in him. He made it come to himself.

"Why should I tell you a problem with myself?" The bartender expected such a stern demeanor. But he felt he was hurt. But Ander continued to speak, disregarding the sullen face on his face. "Besides, my problem is none of your business."

He thought that if the bartender tried to keep himself busy with his job, he wouldn't mind the reality that hit him. That way, he could smile more easily. He tried to answer Ander while he was taking care of the glasses and bottles. "You're right, I'm out of line." While he was pouring a drink into a few glasses, he didn't even know who wanted them or why. But the reality that hit him could not destroy his courage right now. Faced with him, he could not backfire so easily when he had the opportunity to talk to him.  
"But ... wouldn't it be easier to tell a problem to a stranger? After all, I will listen to you and I won't mind because your problem doesn't concern me. But at least you would be relieved to tell someone, wouldn't you?"

Ander knew that the bartender was justified in what they said. But still, telling a stranger about his problem was not as easy as he thought. When it was difficult enough for Ander to talk to someone, talking to a stranger - and about that he had cancer - seemed quite impossible.

He then realized that the self-bartender would have no interest in finding out about his problem. Even if this boy found out about Ander's problem, Ander would not have thanked nor apologized properly. On the contrary, he would tell him about his problem and complain.

"You're right, but ... if I tell you my problem, how will I thank you for what you did for me yesterday?" The tough boy inside Ander always lurked inside Ander to come to light. He was proof of this in the embarrassed expression on his face.

"You will have shared a problem with me. You will meet me and be close to me." The bartender was smiling. That might have been a sneaky smile, but it was pretty innocent. Ander had just misunderstood that smile for a moment.

"I can not understand..."

"If you share your problem with me, it will be our common problem now, and we will try to find a solution together. And so I will get closer to you. And normally you will meet me."

Ander could not help himself with the thought that appeared in his mind. He started laughing, mocking the idea he was thinking inside out.

"Are you flirting with me?"

The bartender nodded only in response to Ander.

Ander couldn't stop his laughter. He had never seen any man be so honest with him. This made him very happy.

"So you're gay?"

"Yeah. Aren't you?"

Ander's laughter subsided, but he had a big smile on his face. This bartender seemed to know him more than Ander thought.

"I guess I am, since you are so confident of himself."

"Actually, I don't know what I'm talking about right now."

Ander gave a small laugh at his response. He was studying her further now. His face, one at the table, one at the table, his arms under a black shirt, his shoulders that were narrow for Ander ... But grief settled in his face with what was in his mind.

"You're going to flirt with me if I tell you about my problem?"

"I will continue to flirt with you." The bartender had a knowing attitude and happiness on his face. He could finally reach the person he wanted.

"Are you sure?"

"I'm not sure if it's a girlfriend or something." the bartender jokingly replied.

"No, it's not like that." Ander smiled. "But after I've said it, you might not want to flirt with me because I might not be able to give you what you want."

The bartender felt a chill in his body. He didn't like this serious attitude that Ander took. He was scared. He was quite afraid of what he would hear.

"The truth is ... I have cancer." Ander let out a deep breath. While speaking, he did not think that he might have a smile on his face, but he was smiling. "I was in the hospital yesterday before I got here. And my doctor told me I have leukemia. No matter how hard I wanted to run away, all I could do was come here. How pathetic, isn't it..."

Omar did not know how to react to what he had learned. How could he expect the pain of what he learned to be so traumatic when he now had the opportunity to be close to someone he had only watched from afar for a long time? He even had the courage to say that he was finally able to flirt with him. He was finally able to speak to him properly. He thought of everything in his mind, that he was interested in girls, not boys, that Omar had a wrong hunch, that he was not the kind of person he thought he was ... But he did not think that he might have cancer.

Ander saw that the man opposite had dropped his face, his gaze changed and he began to squeeze his arm with one of his hands. Just like the bartender said, pouring out to a stranger was comforting. But Ander knew he didn't want his pity. He was not a pitiful, he could not make someone pitiful. As he slowly got up from his seat, he knew that the bartender would not say anything, even if he did, it would be just what he wished for. "Anyway, I will refund your money as soon as possible ... thank you for what you did yesterday. And for listening to my problem." _Find yourself a healthier date._

"Hey!" When Ander turned around, the bartender called out loudly. Ander's getting up from the chair brought him back to life. "You don't even know my name yet, how am I going to date you?"

Ander laughed out of hand.

"Are you serious?"

"I listened to your problem and I still want to flirt with you." When Ander turned back to Omar, he approached his face. As he guessed, his lips were too beautiful for Ander to bear.

"You don't understand the situation, I guess you can't do the things you want with me."

"What kind of things?" Omar ignores him, but he actually knew very well what Ander meant. And Ander was feeling mixed feelings. Because this bartender was still arrogantly flirting with him. As if he didn't say he was sick… He was acting the same.

"Do you just want to sleep with me one night?" Ander had asked directly. "If so, you don't need to waste your time."

Omar quickly denied Ander when he felt a slight burning sensation on his face.

"No, not just one night- so- I want to flirt, but not temporarily." Ander saw that this boy across from him was suddenly stunned and how honest he was about his feelings. For a moment he envied him.

"So, what exactly you want?"

"I want more than just sleep with you."

Ander glanced at Omar's blushing face with a mocking smile, while he was happy.

"Is there more than that?"

"I want to be dear to you. I want to become your lover."

While Ander was trying to grasp these words quickly, he felt his heart beating rapidly and a warmth surrounded his whole body.

"Is this a love confession?" he said in a murmuring low voice. Although it was out of his mouth, he could not believe it. A bartender he didn't know properly confessed love to him. Ander thought this experience was too surreal.

The bartender just swallowed and he nodded to confirm. Ander had asked in such a low voice that he even assumed that the guy had not heard. But when he saw that he was nodded, he took it as an answer.

"You are so serious. Even though we don't know each other?" Ander didn't know how he said this so calmly.

"Actually, I know you a little bit." Omar said it very quietly and in a shy tone.

The rash on the bartender's face and the slightest anxiety convinced Ander that the man was not lying.

"What's my name?" Ander was already enjoying this situation. He knew that this boy could change his world.

"What kind of question is this?" He hesitated a little. "Ander." He takes a deep breath and directs the gaze he had missed for a few seconds at Ander. "Do you think anyone who guessed to be gay wouldn't know your name?"

Ander was letting go of strange feelings inside him. He still had the same smile on his face.

"Sorry, but I don't know the name of the boy who is interested in myself to this degree. Can you tell me?"

Ander was responding to Omar's previous flirting attitude. He was trying to make that intense attention that Omar made with his words through his gaze.

"Omar."

"So Omar ... how will you make me believe that you want to be a lover with me in this sexual lackless?"

"In words." Omar was replying to Ander quite confidently, but still could not digest that he had cancer in him. Right now he could close himself somewhere in the back and cry for hours. But here it was enough to talk to him with these dead tears, only worrying about the love he would experience with him. It was more than enough.

"Words?"

"Yes. Hmmm ... For example ... If you always smile like now, I will never touch you." Omar did not know how he was able to articulate his last sentence. But it was out of his mouth somehow.

Ander laughter resounded in Omar's ear.

"What was this now?"

"A group of words. Sentence."

Ander didn't know how much he got into this dating affair. A smile was not missing on his face. Moreover, he had just told this boy which he did not know, he have cancer and that he is gay.  
He was not like himself. But he felt quite comfortable.

"It looks like you can seduce me with your words."

"Lucky me then." When Omar finished his words, he saw that short distance between their close faces. He wished to act quickly when he approached to close. But at that moment the help requested from him caused his withdrawal. And remembering what he just said little ahead ... I never touch you ...

Ander's still had a little smile on Omar's face as he headed towards the person speaking to him. Omar knew he did not smile often. Even the slightest smile on his face was enough for Omar. But Ander had just laughed with him for minutes. He quickly turned around when he thought that maybe there might be real hope for the two of them.

"Since you have agreed to flirt with me, you can't leave without leaving your phone number!"

"Don't you really know my phone number?"

"If I knew I'd try to flirt with you before."

When Omar said the last sentence, he had drifted away from him. Ander sat back in the chair from which he had stood, with a silly smile on his face. He would then wait there, smiling for hours, and he would not have thought of his illness at that time. All he was thinking about would be the boy who wanted to flirt with him — who actually wanted to be a lover.

Then he would be sure of something, no matter how his life took shape.

In the world of dreams he built himself, this boy would direct everything.

**Author's Note:**

> English isn't my own language. I apologize for my mistakes.  
> It was supposed to be a one-shot story, but I thought it wouldn't be complete if I didn't write more this story. Now you can read the second part. And I want to write more different stories about Omander. So if you have any requests, say it without hesitation.  
> I will be so glad if you share your thoughts with me :)


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